Disaster! I'm out facial lotion.
Nightmare! Grocery Outlet is out of my lotion of choice, the 99 cents stuff, my maximum allotment for facial lotion.
I read the ingredients on the side of the jar. The main ingredient in my lotion, apparently, is mineral oil. I searched online. The most expensive lotions (like, $500?!?) feature olive oil as an ingredient.
So, why not just use olive oil??? I already have olive oil. I don't even have to go to the store, forage for aloe vera plants, pillage a bee hive for wax, or otherwise expend effort gathering ingredients.
Cheapskate, stop laughing. Do you have a good reason to not try using olive oil as a facial lotion? Bold ideas like these change the world so wipe that smirk off your face.
I slathered it on. It spreads so you only need a few drops! I wondered. Will this burn my skin? Will I get zits? Will someone try to put me in their salad?
So far it works great! My skin is so not dry! And, ok, I'm not kidding when I say "not dry". It takes a while to soak in. Like, hours. I imagine this might interfere with one's makeup, if one wears makeup.
I am confident, however, that as a preeminent trendsetter, I will be the envy of all and soon it will be unfashionable, embarrassing even, to appear in public without an oily sheen to one's face.
It's official. Olive oil is now my official facial lotion - and body lotion and foot lotion, too! If bio-diesel cars can leave a trail of odeur de vegetable oil their wake, why can't I?
Jar of cheap lotion: 99 cents
Jar of expensive lotion: $500
Olive oil: 99 cents
Savings: $0 to $499