Pets: Cat Grass

Dear Cheapskate,

Have you ever spent $3.99 on one of those little pots of lush green cat grass at the pet store? You thought, boy, my faithful cat would love to munch on that cat grass. And really, money is no object here, because what is money compared to the happiness of my precious pet? Then you saw, next to the little pots of cat grass, little bags of cat grass seeds for sale? You thought, I could save money growing my own cat grass, which will make me happy, and my cat will be happy, too! We'll both be happy!

You can indeed grow your own cat grass!! But not by buying those seeds you saw at the pet store. Oh, no. I have a much better idea.

My dear Cheapskate, I have a fantastically cheap idea for you today.

I did what you did. I went to the pet store. I saw that cat grass. I saw those seeds. I saw the price of those seeds ($2.95 for one ounce of seeds!), and I thought - what kinds of seeds are these exactly? What is cat grass, really?
I read the label: barley, oats, wheat.

Barley, oats, wheat??!!?? This is what this fancy, special, mysterious, cat grass is made of? For $2.95 per ounce? That's, like, $47.20 per pound! (As a highly motivated cheapskate, I have learned to do such calculations quickly in my head. You will, too. I promise.) Can't I buy oatmeal from the bin at the grocery store for $1.25 per pound? Don't they have whole grains there, too, in those bins? Cat grassy grains like barley, oats, and wheat???

I rode my bicycle as fast as I could to Berkeley Bowl (a very cool grocery store) and I ran to the bins section. (Wear sneakers for optimal running.) I bought 32 cents worth of whole oats, 43 cents worth of wheat berries, and 39 cents worth of whole barley. (I also had the free cheese sample while I was there.)

I planted a little pot using a fraction of my seed supply, watered it every day, and voilà! It grew! It grew into beautiful, tall, green, delicious (according to Beaubeau - I didn't taste it myself) cat grass. And I'm not even good at growing things!!!

I know you can't believe it - all that cat grass for $1.14. But wait, there's more. This was a year ago and I'm still using that same supply of seeds and there are still a lot of seeds in those little baggies! That $1.14 worth of grain grows a LOT of cat grass!

Tip: As soon as one pot of cat grass is tall and ready to give to your cat, plant seeds in a second pot. When the fist batch is eaten or has turned brown, the second will be ready.

Calcuation:
At the pet store: $3.99 every two weeks for cat grass. That's $103.74 per year.
Plant edible grains: $1.14 for (eternity?) a year.
Savings: $102.60 per year!!!!

And think of all the time you saved not going to the pet store, and the money you saved because you weren't at the pet store so you weren't tempted to buy a bunch of junk you didn't need while you were there!

And you grew your own grass!! How cool is that???? You farmer, you.

PS The pot and dirt were free. I'll tell you how to get free stuff like pots and dirt in another post. I know you can't wait!!!!

Q-Tips!

Dear Cheapskate,

I thought up a brand new cheapskate thing today! I'm so proud of myself. I'm talking about Q-Tips. This is the sort of disposable item that I don't usually buy - I would never buy paper towels or paper napkins, for example. But Q-tips are indispensable, for me, for removing eye makeup.
How often do you use only one tip and then chuck the whole thing into the garbage when there's still a perfectly good tip left on the other end? A perfectly good tip wasting away in that nasty bathroom garbage bin. (Note I have refrained from describing particular items in said bathroom garbage bin. Use your imagination.) That's my $$$, earned doing soul sucking tasks for the man, being tossed thoughtlessly away. I'll keep those soft cottony tips, thank you.

The Tip on Q-Tips: Cut them in half!

That's right. By cutting them in half so that there is only one wonderful cottony tip per stick, you throw away only used tips, and you DOUBLE your money.

Calculation: $10 for a giant two-pack at Costco, purchased once every two years. Savings: $10 over two years. I save $5 per year!! Ok, reality check, that's not a lot of money. That's 1.37 cents per day. But I'm a CHEAPSKATE. I want that $5. I'll pay that $5 down on my house, or waste in on chocolate, or whatever.

My dear Cheapskate, stop! I can hear you snickering.
"Right, like, saving 1.37 cents a day is going to enable me to quit my job. Ha ha," you're saying.
Here is your very important lesson: You must change your thinking. You must never say, "Oh, that only costs 1.37 cents per day." You must always concentrate on the money you are saving. Every time you use a cut-in-half-Q-Tip think about how you are saving $5, or 50%!

Never spend money you earned by working. Our goal is to save save save and get that money working FOR you!


Next challenge: Come up with a free, home-made, Q-Tip substitute.


Dear Aspiring Cheapskate, I am bursting with ideas for you! I have so much to tell you about vegetables, cat grass, split peas, earthquake retrofits, transportation, home ownership, Bay Area bridges, CHOCOLATE kisses, and oh, so much more.

I know you can't wait. There is so much to come. I'm only getting started.